Great quote..

   I saw this quote while driving yesterday, and had to get a shot of it before I forgot it. I was on my way home-ish from the gym, and it just struck me as sooo inspiring. And while it's a shitty picture, it's still a great quote, imo.

I had an epiphany of sorts while on the treadmill before our vacation, and it's made running a lot 'easier'. I was holding on to the treadmill for dear freaking life, and it just about killed me to get through 1 minute of running. So once I realized that's what i was doing, I relaxed my whole body, and it was just *easier* to run. The last few times I've been out, I try and keep conscious of the fact I need to be relaxed to run, and I think it's really helping.  I'm working on week 2 of c25k now, and i really felt good while running today. I even upped my speed a tad. Not saying I wasn't totally bagged by the end of the half hour walk-run cycle, but still. But hey, I ran, and hubs was on the couch. Feels good to be the one lapping someone for a change!

i did it...

I've started C25K.. I'm using the treadmill schedule on the site, and so far it's going ok. i run slower than I walk, which seems backwards to me, but hey, it is what it is. I think i'll take it slowly and do week 1 again next week, and see how that goes. I have a few friends online who have expressed interest in starting with me, but not sure if they're going to actually do it or not. I HAVE to do something so I'm not always "Joel's fat mom" and this is the start.

For more info on C25K, check the guys who developed the program:
C25k at Cool Running

And another plus-size blogger - http://plussizerunner.wordpress.com/

Call me...

What I saw in the mirror..

Jabba. No, really. I caught a look at myself in a full-length mirror on the weekend, and it was like Jabba was staring back at me. I knew I'd let myself go (further), but YIKES. I'm back up to the (approximate) weight I was when I gave birth to LJ, and it's soooo not pretty. Funny thing, shortly before catching the mirror shot, I told friends on the weekend that I'm gonna run the MacPass Mile next year. One mile, across the bridge between Dartmouth & Hali. It's only a mile. I can do it. Bigger people than me have started running, I will too. I'll be slow at first, but slow & steady wins the race. I'd rather be slow-like-turtle than dead-like-doornail... And hey, now that I've said it AND written it, means I've got to do it, right? So Aug 4/13... this gal will be running a mile. Hopefully without a cupcake on a string in front of my nose to boot (no promises though).

Today I start as a volunteer with GoodLife Fitness in their JUMP program (child-minding). 3h/week, every Tuesday evening, and I'll be working with my good friend L. After 4 weeks of volunteer sessions, I am entitled to a FREE gym membership for me & J. As long as I volunteer, I can work out there for free. Seems like a no-brainer. I need to get back to doing something active. I miss the walks LJ & I would take last year when I was on leave. I was so happy when I was able to do 5km pushing the stroller (about 50 lbs between baby & stroller), even with part of it uphill - but I doubt I could do it now, less than a year later.

So, I have to get back at it. Less crap & sloth-like behaviour. Those four weeks of volunteering before the gym will help me feel comfortable with all the "pretty peeps" and hopefully once the membership is activated I can jump in to working out a few nights a week..I can't do every day, life with a lil one just doesn't allow for it. But I can give a couple days a week, and see where that gets me. Can't get me in any worse of a situation...

medical "professionals"...

...Inspired by Fat Heffalump's letter to medical professionals Go take a minute to read her letter. I'll wait here...

Ok. Awesome, no?

I actually commented, as it really rang true to a lot of what I have experienced..  This was my comment:

While not diabetic, I have struggled with many of the same issues you have, especially medical "professionals" who can't fathom that I'm happy at 300-ish lbs, and imply that it's my weight & (assumed) craptastic diet causing my depression, gall bladder attacks, probs getting pg, etc not the actual issues at hand. 

 And it's true. Want proof?

• I had a nurse who was supposed to be helping me with PPD back in the spring imply that my depression was caused by my size, while I see it as I'm fat because I'm depressed - totally different, IMO... 
• At the end of May I had my first real gall bladder attack. We went to the ER, and while taking my history, the nurse noted that I just had a baby. "oh, then it's probably gall stones. It's very common after you have a baby". When the doctor finally saw me, he blew that off, and said "you had pizza for dinner, then pizza & coffee for breakfast. you're not young anymore... its' just indigestion". and after many months, a few more attacks & an abdominal ultrasound, guess what? "Multiple mobile (gall)stones - RX gall bladder removal". Thanks arse. If you would've seen PAST my 300-lb arse, I might have had the u/s in the summer & surgery be over by now, instead of it (most likely) conflicting with work.
• As for the problems getting pregnant, well, there was the comment made to me by the RE during our Embryo Transfer, and the lovely "I can't believe *YOU* aren't the reason you two can't get pregnant..." by a different RE early in the game. well that's supportive, no? :P OY. 

 I'm glad my GPs in the last 10yrs have been ok with my weight (as long as BP was controlled, etc), and that the nutritionist I'm seeing isn't making me journal every bite I eat, or count calories, etc. So ya, maybe some medical professionals DO get that some people who are fat are OK - OK with being fat, and just OK in general.

Just do it...

You've probably heard that before somewhere... but sometimes it's just what you've got to do. Suck it up & just do "it", whatever your "it" is.

For me, I am a hill-o-phobe. I hate walking uphill.  If I'm walking somewhere, I will plan my route so I walk the least amount of uphill, and the majority either downhill or flat. (I believe this comes from years of living in Winnipeg, where the only "hills" there were to climb were overpasses... ) But I've been getting a bit bored with the 4km loop I've been doing lately (mostly flat with two hills), so I decided to switch it up. Instead of turning at my usual spot, I kept going... UP a hill. it was slow going, I mean, not only was I dragging my ass up the hill, but pushing a stroller too, but I got up there. I got to the end of the road, and then decided to "just see what was over that hill..." to my right, and there I went - up another one! Once I got there, it was fairly flat, and I knew that I was close to the highest point in my neighborhood (for reals), so I made my way back to the main street and started back home. By meandering a bit through the residential part of the area, I avoided walking straight up the damn big hill I'm usually scared to attempt (because I know I wouldn't make it) and got to walk down it instead :P All in all, I ended up walking a hair over 5k today, in just over an hour. I'm  actually pretty proud of myself for doing this walk - not only was it a beautiful day, but I felt fabulous after.

I haven't been running much on my walks lately, as we've been walking with an older neighbor in the mornings. It's nice having someone to talk to - makes teh time fly & the hills less painful (seriously). Our routine was off today, so it was just me & the babe walking this afternoon, so I ran a bit when I felt up to it. I'd love to try Couch to 5k, but sad truth, I can't run for a minute yet, let alone many of them. I'll get there though. Slow & steady wins the race...

OH - and I'm doing the walk again tomorrow with a friend :D

Interview with a Tweep!

Words of Inspiration - interview with Dreena Guptill

Dreena is one of my tweeps from Edmonton... in the last year & a half, she has lost over 110 lbs hula hooping! This interview is about her journey to lose weight - what inspired/s her, where she came from & where she's at. A lot of what she says rings true to me... I'd love to start hooping, but classes in these parts are few & far between. I guess I could "pull a Dreena" and just get a hoop & start at it in the backyard...

Run Forrest Run!

So, a funny thing happened on thursday when babe & i were out for our walk... i got it in my head that i was going to run a bit, so i did! about a whole 100m, but still. it's a start. and y'know, it felt pretty good!

So then, during Friday's walk, I ran a bit more (4 stints, abt 340m in total - walk was almost 4km).

We went to j's parents yesterday, so i didn't go for a walk, but tonight after we got home & unpacked & babe was sleeping & my blog post for tomorrow's blog hop was done, i had this little niggling to go for a "wrun" (a walk that includes little runs interspersed. yes, it's a chelle-ism :)) so i did! i'm not sure how much of my approx 2k wrun was run v walk - probably abt 300ish mtrs again - but it felt pretty good to get out. it was a lovely night for a wrun... a bit overcast tho, so gps didn't accurately track. ah well.

if i'm going to get serious i need a good pair of runners, some reflective gear & a good sports bra (maybe even a new-to-me jogging stroller??) but for now, i'm enjoying just getting out & doing what i can. i've wanted to learn to run forever. now i'm finally doing something about it.

********

kinda unrelated, but i totally noticed at the ILs today that i've lost inches around me midsection. still many to go, but yay! i might actually take measurements on wed (weigh day) & then again with each visit to nutritionist. we'll see tho.