Random thoughts

I bought a skipping rope today from the dollar store. It broke after 15 minutes, and boy was I glad! Man, that was hard work, and my shins/calves are killing me. Also, my bladder is not the same as it was before having a kid. Eek.

I ran into one of my old clients in the post office today. He asked how the kid was doing, and I said she's running everywhere. He commented on how I've lost weight, so she must be keeping me running. It's such a Catch-22. I want people to notice that I have, but I hate when they say anything to me. I don't mind if my friends, who have been following my journey, comment on it, but to just have someone on the street comment on it? Ick.

Also, I will be seeing my mother in 2 weeks. She is sure to comment. I don't want her to. She's always commented on my weight (good or bad). I'm sure she'll tell me she's "proud of me". The problem with this is that I've always felt like she's most "proud" when I'm skinny enough for her liking. There's a lot of baggage here that I don't totally feel like going into at the moment.

Plateau be gone!

I crossed the -20 mark today... -22 to be exact :D

I wasn't feeling well Sunday/yesterday, so while not eating a lot those days (except at a weddign shower on Sunday - ugh), I didn't completely not eat, so 'sall good. Feeling better today - back on all my meds, drinking more water, 'sall good.

Now, if I can just get my fat arse off the couch, i'd be golden.

It's 11:12 Friday night...

and I'm out of flex points for the week. I still have three days to go. Wish me luck!

So close...

I missed the -20 mark by a measley .6 lbs this morning. Which does of course mean that I have busted outta the plateau I was in, and am losing again. 10.6 lbs to go to my first goal, and 13.8 to go to the second. (Yes, I have two goals that are 3 lbs apart. You have problems with that?? :P ) Totally doable in a few weeks, I might even surpass the goals.

I have found that as much as I'm journalling everything, I still tend to go over my flex points for the week, but really. I still tend to eat an average of 2000 cal/day, which I'm guessing is considerably less than I was eating. Therefore, even without exercising, I will still lose. The ww is just great for tracking for me. The tools are easy to use, and I have them open 24/7 while at work or home. And yes, I realize that by exercising I'd gain points to eat, and would no longer be going over the flex point allotment, but meh. I have my moments. and seriously, I will get off my arse. Eventually.

Anyway. that was quite the ramble, my bad. Have a good week, all!

Oh my darling, you look ONEderful tonight

I made it! 198.2 was the beautiful number on my scale this morning (-5 since last week - damn water weight last week)!

Stalled...

like our old Crapalier, I'm stalled. I've basically been stalled (within .6 lbs) for the last 2 weeks. I've been overeating, and just kinda blah. I know I have to start exercising and staying on track, but I find it really hard to do lately. I'd love to hit that 20lb mark, or 30 or 40... don't know what's stopping me. I have had comments that people can see the change now, hopefully this will kick start me into losing again. blah.......

oink oink moo...

Self-sabotage

This week, I should've been able to get to under 200lbs. Last week, I was at 201, and "one-derland" was in sight. So what do I do? Eat a bunch of brownies and pistachios and other things that are really bad for me, and go back up to 203.2.

I'm so fucking mad at myself right now. I've been slacking off since bootcamp ended - still working out, but not as often or as hard or as I was. Why is it that when someone else puts expectations/goals on me, I can't let them down, but I have no problem letting myself down?